Telephone Mini Intervention

Last night I had a telephone mini intervention with my old friend who should have died last weekend from drinking far too much. It went o.k. I guess. For the most part I voiced my concern the way I wanted, and they were kind enough to fully listen, even if they did not take it all in. I even was able to be calm about it and not go irrate about just how stupid they have been behaving. Believe me, I wanted to yell and slap them across the face multiple times, because I think sometimes, people need to be slapped from time to time in the hopes that that knocks the sense back into them.

Frankly, as calm as the whole conversation went, it does not seem that their eyes are fully open to just how stupid AND lucky they have been over the past few months. The only saving grace of the entire conversation is that they are not 100% stupid - they realize that if they stopped breathing multiple times in the hospital, that they could have just as easily stopped breathing at their friends house while sleeping. Falling and getting a concussion saved their life.

Now, my heart is heavy because I know the percentage of them getting to a very dangerous level again is incredibly high. They do not know how to cope with stress and depression and admitted that turning to the bottle to ease the pain for a few hours was getting easier and easier and very tempting. It hurts to say that I will not be surprised if it happens again or if they end up dead.

I am at a loss of words. I do not know what to do. I have reached out, to them, and their closest family member. They take it as a joke (the old friend) and try to play it off as if they are just going through I rough patch, when we all know it is more serious than that.

So I pose these questions... What can I do? They have a young child. Does that child need to be taken away for a while? Do they need to seek help in a more permanent way (i.e. Mental Help facility)? Do I tell them that I can not stand by and watch them self destruct even more? I am perplexed as to what is the right plan of action, because I can not be their crutch and shoulder to lean on again. I am tired of it and overly drained by it. I have got my own shit to deal with.

Booze Repugnance

As of late, I have decided that I am not down with drinking booze that often any more. It is not like I was obsessing or over drinking either. In fact, there is no real reason except that I just do not feel like it at the present time. It is a personal choice I have made before and one I am happy to do again.

As of yesterday, I got a phone call from an old friend who I have not talked to in weeks. It reassured me that I was indeed making a good decision, and even if I was not where I am at currently, surely the conversation would have put me there.

**As a disclaimer and politeness to my old friend, I will refer to them as a sexless being while telling their story.

Basically, they ended up in the hospital this past weekend due to drinking an excessive amount of alcohol - rum, vodka, whiskey, tequila, etc etc... They even got kicked out of the club they were at (always a first for everything right?). At one point they fell and hit their head, which landed them in the hospital because they started to convulse and stopped breathing a whopping 4 times! Yes, you heard correct. To top things off, guess their blood alcohol level. No really, guess. It is pretty shocking.... .324!!!!! They should have died. And the fact that they walked away with only a concussion is damn amazing. I hope they have learned their lesson that they can no longer do stupid shit, because truthfully, they have been on a destructive path for a while now (and I thought New Years was bad), and they have a wee one to take care of. It is about time they GROW THE FUCK UP!!!! And realize that their actions affect everyone around them. My only doubt with the entire situation and this person, is that they will do it again. And honestly, I do not think I can be there to watch/hear about it one more time.

Letting friends go can be hard, but sometimes necessary.

POP Levi

Check this dude out that I just discovered: Pop Levi. He's uber funky and amuses me immensely. BTW, he's playing at the Doug Fir, this Friday (March 6) at 9pm. I am not planning on attending, but thought I would give a shout out for him anyways. Rock on dude!

Everything Is Amazing, Nobody Is Happy...

Wake up people! This guy (Louis C.K.) is on to something. We have it better than we think.

I Need Work Lament

Originally, I was going to bitch how I need more work. And the truth is, I still do. But I do not need to bitch, at least not at the current moment. Well, o.k., that is a lie. Technically I could bitch about one particular thing, design wise, if I wanted, but when I really start to think about it, I have calmed down enough to where I am no longer fuming from every pore of my body. Yes, it takes a lot for me to get to that level, and it dose not happen often, but man, when it does, watch out, as I am not a pleasant person. BTW, I do not like getting to that point at all.

As for needing more work. It seems to be slowly, but surly starting to mold into what will hopefully be a successful and prosperous leap into the freelance design world. I have also managed to meet more people in the design realm of major fashion companies - exactly the direction I want to go in - graphics for apparel and gaining a better understanding of designing apparel. I already have ideas floating around as to what things I want to design and make. Now it is just time to implement.

HA! O.k., so this lament has turned into a positive thing. Guess I needed to just say the word to realize that it is not really that bad. Just not 100% where I want and need it to be just yet.

CREEPER!!!!

In the last few days I have been what I consider bombarded with strange, unexpected and eerie emails. It is quite un-nerving and everytime I open my email I am faced with either A) A creepy email or B) A dread that I will have a creepy email. It totally blows. I have no idea what to do about it. I haven't responded, and I certainly don't plan to. All I can say is, please, please, STOP emailing me. It's NOT flattering. It's NOT cute. NO, I DON'T want virtual roses. You are a creeper (and yes, that means you're creepy).

After forwarding a friend about it, asking if there was a way to block certain people from emailing you on that particular server, they sent me a response which included a youtube clip. A creeper of a different form. It is a good example of why, if interested or not, you get their number, instead of giving yours.

And It Continues On...

So.... I like playful banter.... A LOT! In the last year and a half it has definitely become one of my many guilty pleasures, probably in the top three. It's fun, sometimes provocative and never boring. For me, I relate the feeling of good playful banter to when you first start to really like someone and you get the flutters and giddiness. It's one of the best feelings and natural highs in the world. Sometimes I think it's my safe zone because it's a game, seeing how far you can push things without actually going there (er, um, yeah....). Admit it, who wouldn't like to receive a text saying... 'Je tiens à vous mordre'... Hmmm???

Point being, I have slipped, if you indeed want to call it that. A week ago, I was left feeling a little 'eh' after talking to a certain someone and told myself, 'What's the point of continuing on'? Well, simply put, because I like how it makes me feel the majority of the time. This person most likely isn't someone I would call in an emergency, but they've been there, steady and true, for well over a year now. I can't say that about a lot of people, especially when I had my stint abroad both times. Anyways, they're fun and I know they're down for almost anything of any kind, and you know, even though I told myself all of seven days ago that it would stop, I've discovered that I just like it far too much to give it up just yet. Heck, it's not hurting anyone...